Do We Have the Gimmies? And Too Much Stuff?

(photo courtesy of Amazon.com)

Lately there's a lot of loud humming in my head. There's too much of it this time of year when the toy commercials come on constantly, the newspaper arrives loaded with extra ads and inserts what a waste of trees, and the emails for special sales and promotions flood my inbox. It's enough to put this girl into a tailspin. And it ain't pretty, people.

I've been reading a lot of posts lately that have made me even more pensive about life and "stuff", like this one on homelessness via Diana Adams of Bit Rebels. And this one about gratitude and greed via my friend Amy Oscar.

I've also been thinking about this video, The Story of Stuff, which you should watch if you haven't already.

Then my BFF Shelly Kramer of V3 Integrated Marketing  and I went road trippin' to BFE Bern, Kansas on Saturday to pick up our cow. You know the one. And if you don't, go here to catch up. I'll wait.

Anycow, we had lots of time in the car to talk, seeing as we took a few minor detours, including one to, um, Nebraska (cough, cough). When we came upon this sign

I slammed on the brakes and pulled over freaking out slightly. Shelly, ever level-headed, got on her phone to call the meat packing plant for more specific directions (let's just say country folk don't get that we city people aren't used to going off the grid. My GPS was no help--it showed us kinda floating on a screen of white space). As we drove, wide open fields raced past us while a beautiful blue sky floated gracefully above. Grasses turning dry and brown, trees that seemed naked with the recent loss of their leaves. I squealed as we passed cattle grazing, baby calves, deer, and even alpaca!  

We talked while we drove through several small farm towns as we neared Bern. Shelly mentioned how different people's lives are up there. For example, Deborah, the woman whose cow we bought, lives in a very small house with her husband, two kids, and a third on the way. Her kids have no idea what Gogurt is, and the abhorrent fruit snacks my kids are addicted to are completely alien to them. Their nearest grocery store is a half hour drive away. Deborah and her neighbors stock a nearby food pantry with essentials so that in a pinch they can grab what they need: a sack of flour, maybe some sugar, and perhaps some beans or potatoes. There is no McDonald's in Bern. There is no Wal-Mart in Bern. It's truly all very quaint, simple, and quiet. Nothing but miles and miles of farmland around, wide open spaces, and consequently less of a need or desire for the "stuff" the rest of us constantly crave and find so necessary.

What a different life many of us lead. It's difficult for me to admit, but we definitely lead a life of excess. We have not only what we need, but so much more. I drive a two-year-old minivan that we bought brand new; we live in a large new house with plenty of space; and our girls have their own playroom in the basement that's overflowing with Barbies, an easel, a doll house, kiddie table & chairs set, a ginormous dress-up trunk, and a small inflatable bouncy house (thank you very much for the Craigslist find, Shelly!). We go out to nice meals at restaurants when we want, go to the movie theater, shop at Banana Republic, The Gap, Target and Old Navy. We have several different chains of grocery stores available to us, all within a two or three mile radius. We take all of this for granted.

Still, we are generous. We donate to many different charities and make a point of supporting lots of people and organizations in need. I keep granola bars and packs of peanut butter crackers in my car to hand out to the homeless, along with the smile Diana Adams talks about in her post. This morning I dropped off several large bags of clothes, shoes, housewares, etc. at Goodwill. I support Heifer International and send meaningful gifts to help people around the world receive training that helps them become self-reliant. Not only is that being green, it's not just more "stuff."

But here I am trying to make all these excuses for myself. When I'm part of the problem of "stuff."

As I type this, there's a closet upstairs where we're hiding Hanukkah and birthday gifts for our daughters. Part of me can't help it. They are still so young. I'm hopeful we can gradually ease away from this unhealthy obsession and instead do things like volunteer at shelters or food kitchens someday when they are older. Maybe rather than giving each other presents, we can commit to putting that money towards a charity (or a few) we all believe in and want to support. There are so many in need. I have taught my children about homelessness and while they clearly don't fully understand it, they do show sympathy and they enjoy helping me dole out snacks or put money in a bucket. If I have my way, within a few years we'll take gifts to a nearby children's hospital to hand out.

And that good feeling, that high I get from helping others? That's the only "stuff" I really need.

Do You Know My Friend Amy Oscar?

After my last post, I had a long conversation with my friend, Amy Oscar, who is an intuitive spiritual consultant. She was one of many I was lucky enough to meet at CIP, Sarah Robinson's conference I attended in September. What Amy does is fascinating, and I encourage you to read more about it here. Talking through things with her helped me put together some of the puzzle pieces I wrote about on Monday. One particular thing Amy said has stuck with me: "The story we tell over and over again is not the story." She suggested I take a look at things that were going on within our family before my dad came out of the closet. And indeed, there were things going on, but they will have to wait for another post.

According to Amy (I'm using her words verbatim because she says it far better than I could):

The third chakra is the seat of the will (and willpower). This is the place where "fire in the belly" lives, the personal 'foundry' where we forge, through our choices, the life that we will ultimately manifest.

In terms of your hernia, its location suggests to me a weakness in your ability to own your own choices, your authority over your own life. I said that perhaps, continuing to tell the story of the wound that you received when your father came out was holding you in the past - and holding this weakness/vulnerability open even though that event happened many years ago. Understanding the energy anatomy of the body can help us understand how symptoms and illness are often (I said, always) linked to causal factors in the psyche and energy body. In this way, a hernia - a weakness in the abdominal wall above the navel - suggests, to me, that this weakness, held over time had manifested from the energy body to the physical body and now physical surgery is the solution. From the perspective of energetic healing, you can support this surgery - and prevent further symptoms, recurrence, weakness in this chakra - by addressing the psychological issues in play.

Amy sent me here to check out this educational diagram of all the chakras and where they reside (if you're a curious bird like me). I was so intrigued that I asked Amy to give me the names of some books about all of this stuff so I can investigate further. Working with Amy again would be wonderful (if she's willing), and I'm  looking forward to learning and discovering more.

If you'd like to connect with Amy, you can find her on Twitter here:
Her blog is incredible, and I encourage you to subscribe now.
You can also find her on Facebook here.
Pssssst. She's also got a book coming!! It's going to be phenomenal, just like Amy!

Bits and pieces of our conversation, stream-of-consciousness style:

**symptoms in the body = flags from the psyche.
**so many things I'm dealing with: rage, betrayal, lying, and identity issues. All of these things coming to a head are like the an infection, like the wound in my abdominal wall.
**when I was 15, I shoved it all under the carpet to hide it-- the secret of my gay dad.
**intubation = symbolic b/c I could not speak, did not speak, did not have/use my voice.
**shame in homosexuality --> imagery I used of something I was choking on, being shoved down my throat.
**start looking at what was going on before dad came out.
**his coming out = his pulling the tube (intubation) out.
**other truths may still be buried, carrying a weight.
** the 3rd chakra is navel/stomach/belly button area = powerlessness.
**my dad didn't do anything to me, he did it for himself (I do know this, but still it's hard)
**to be writing/thinking about all of this now is good, but risky in a way because of the historical blow coupled with the anniversary of the wound, and now surgery in the same week. But may also be cathartic and very healing (literally and metaphorically).

Amy gave me some food for thought in a big way. She was brilliant, insightful, kind, and gentle with me. I'm utterly and completely in awe of her. So hurry on over to her blog and get to know her!